You Cannot Crucify Yourself
Sanctification as surrender to the Spirit’s death-and-resurrection work.
Years ago, I saw something that deeply disturbed me.
In a village in the Philippines called San Pedro Cutud, there’s a Good Friday tradition where men (and, on occasion, women) volunteer to be nailed to wooden crosses.
Real nails, driven through real palms, while a crowd watches, devotion and spectacle tangled together in ways I find ghastly.
I found it tragic, in the way anything born of misplaced devotion tends to be tragic.
And yet, the intention of devotion underneath it all seemed to be sincere. These were people trying to imitate Christ as fully as a human body allows.
That’s the part that gets me. Sincerity isn’t the same thing as accuracy.
I think the theology underneath it gets something exactly backward.
They were trying to finish, with their own bodies, a work that had already been finished for them.
Paul says, “I have been crucified with Christ.”
But here’s the thing: You can’t crucify yourself.
Think about it. Once you nail one hand to the cross, you can’t reach the hammer for the other.
Crucifixion is something done to you, not something you do to yourself.
You may participate in it by surrender, but you cannot perform it solo.
And that’s the whole point.
The Christian life is not self-improvement. It’s death and resurrection.
The old you… the one enslaved to performance, addicted to approval, driven by fear… doesn’t get reformed.
It gets executed.
And you can’t pull that off on your own.
Only the Spirit can kill the rot that needs to die within you.
Sanctification is not a self-help project. It’s a Spirit-haunted execution site that turns into a garden.
You don’t grow holy by straining. You grow holy by allowing the false self to perish so you can be resurrected into joy.
Stop trying to bootstrap your way to glory. You’re not that powerful.
But Christ is.
And I dare say, He’s still in the resurrection business.
-Aaron
If this work has fed you, challenged you, or pushed you closer to Jesus, then I need your help!
I’m Aaron, a former long-time church staff pastor now doing ministry out in the wild. Since 2018, I’ve been building GoodLion Ministries to help young adults follow Jesus deeply in a post-modern, post-Christian age that pulls them in a thousand directions.
On Sunday evenings, I lead the GoodLion School of Discipleship, a multi-year formation program where young adults wrestle with Scripture, ask hard questions, and build a faith that can handle doubt and chaos. Through this work, I watch students move from confusion to clarity, from fear to faithfulness, from being spiritually adrift to knowing how to walk with Jesus in real life.
I also write here on Substack, mentor young leaders, and create resources for people who want substance over hype.
Our mission is simple: We believe in Jesus, the King who is not safe but is very good. We’re here for the doubters, the deconstructors, the burnt-out ministers, the church kids haunted by legalism, and anyone tired of shallow faith.
Here’s the reality: I’m bivocational. For years, I’ve supported my family through freelance work while building this ministry in every spare hour I can find. My goal is to transition to doing this work full time so I can expand the School, write more, travel to teach, raise up more leaders, and serve every single person who need what GoodLion offers.
This is my life’s work. For nearly 20 years, I’ve been helping Gen Z learn to think deeply, wrestle honestly, and follow Jesus in a world that tries to pull them apart.
If you believe this work matters, I invite you partner with me! This is not a side hustle for me. This is a mission. Even $10/month helps me teach more, write more, and disciple more young adults who genuinely need it.
👉 Support GoodLion Ministries Here
Thank you for walking with me.
– Aaron
Links
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🎓 GoodLion School of Discipleship